keep having a re-occurring dream: I am standing in my parents’ backyard, I’m perhaps ten or eleven, and I look up and see a spacecraft. It is long and rectangular, metallic, with a lot of details on the surface like one might see on a battleship – not the smooth surfaces of ships that many report. I feel like I know this ship. “Oh there are you!” I always say. I feel like the ship is home, or represents home.
I call myself
During those nine months, I started receiving phone calls from myself. People in the theater or in TV/film know their own voices. My voice kept calling on the phone, but all it would say is: “Hello?” I’d say hello back but not get an answer, just “hello?” In the background were car sounds. I knew this person was calling from a payphone. “Hello? Hello?” my own voice was saying to me.
“What’s wrong?” I later asked. “Why can’t you speak?”
Why was I calling myself?
At Terri’s house, around five in the morning, her answering machine turned on. There was no phone ringing, no outgoing message from her, just my voice: “Hello? Hello? Hello?” Then it hung up.
Terri was awake.
“Was that me who just called?” I said to her.
“Yes,” she said.
I was relieved – now I had a witness. “You see,” I told her, “I wasn’t making it up, I have been calling myself.”
She said, “I never doubted you.”
I pondered on the meaning of this. I imagined that, in the future, I found a method of time travel, and I was going back in time, perhaps to warn myself (and if I could travel back to 1997, I would indeed warn myself to end the affair with Terri, or to not even start it, because it transpired in disaster and heartache).
In Sedona, I had a Tarot card reading and asked the reader what the calls meant. She told me: “The entities took a part of you with them, to learn something. Your soul has been split in two. That was your other half, looking to reconnect with you, or perhaps to see if you wanted to go with him and become whole again.”
Men in black
Yes, Terri and I went to Sedona in 1997. She was compelled to go and she asked me to join her. I knew nothing of Sedona and its mystical surroundings but when we arrived, I knew why the place had been calling both of us.
For the most part, Sedona was a grand spiritual journey the way it is for many. There was only one bad moment. It was late at night; we were driving toward one of the mountain vortices. There was a looming negative feeling in the air. Terri and I were both aware of it – and she was aware of a car following us. She was driving and tried to shake the car off our tail, but whatever turns she made, it also made. Finally, she stopped, spun around, and drove quickly toward the vehicle behind us: it was an older model sedan, black, with two men sitting in front, wearing dark suits, white shirts, and black ties… and sunglasses at night.
Terri stifled a scream. My head was buzzing. We had both heard of the men in black, and this was long before the stupid Will Smith movie. The two men watched us drive by them. They didn’t continue following, though, and we were both relieved for that.
Back out in Borrego Springs, we drove to a friend’s trailer to say goodbye, we were leaving to go back to the city. It was ten in the morning. When we got there, my friend said, “Did you forget something?” We didn’t understand what he meant. “You were just here,” he said, and explained that we had come by, twenty minutes earlier, to say goodbye, that we were going back to the city. He swore we stayed a few minutes and talked to him.
Driving away, Terri and I just looked at each other. We didn’t need to say anything; we both knew it was just another paranormal event…
A list of further incidents would become repetitive: more hybrid nurturing that I later recalled under hypnosis; sightings of people we once knew who were dead; dark-suited men looming about and observing us…
‘The entities took a part of
you with them, to learn something. Your soul has
been split in two.’
Does this sound like enough to make a person paranoid?
I knew something profound was going on but I could not put my finger on it, and there was more to it than the alien entities; they were only a part of it, pieces of a big puzzle. They were around all the time during those nine months; I could feel their presence, observing me. I started to become quite paranoid: keeping the window shades drawn, the doors locked, jumping at any sound. One time I was sitting behind the computer and noticed the moon in the sky, peeking in through a crack of the window